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Apple PodcastsMany collaboration issues are attributed to disagreement, lack of alignment, or resistance. In reality, they often start much earlier, with something far more subtle: using the same words to mean different things.
In this episode of Le Podcast on Emerging Leadership, I had the great pleasure of welcoming Michael DeLanzo to explore why coming to terms with terms is such a critical leadership practice.
A misunderstanding that sparked the conversation. The idea for this episode came from a feedback exchange following the podcast episode How to Create Great Goals?. As a listener, Michael initially disagreed with the level of abstraction and scope I was proposing for goals and objectives. As we discussed further, it became clear that the disagreement was not about intent or quality, but about definitions. Once we clarified our respective meanings, the apparent disagreement disappeared.
Clarifying terms as a leadership act. Without shared definitions, conversations drift, decisions become fragile, and frustration accumulates silently. Clarity of language creates clarity of thought and action.
Communication modes matter. We explore how written vs. spoken and synchronous vs. asynchronous exchanges each carry their own strengths and risks — and how misunderstandings often arise when the mode is chosen by habit rather than intention. Cultural and language differences amplify the challenge: "Britain and America are two nations divided by a common language."
Thinking, meetings, and time well spent. The conversation touches on passive thinking vs. critical thinking, and why writing can be a powerful tool to support deeper reflection. We reference ideas such as "meetings are the last resort, not the first option" and "five people in a room for an hour isn't a one-hour meeting, it's a five-hour meeting", plus practices used at Amazon and Twitter where written documents replace slide decks.
When collaboration feels hard, sometimes the most impactful move is much simpler: slow down and clarify the words you are using.
In this episode, we discuss
- •Why many collaboration issues start with using the same words to mean different things.
- •How a feedback exchange about goals and objectives sparked the conversation.
- •Clarifying terms as a leadership act — the starting point for any meaningful collaboration.
- •How conversations drift, decisions become fragile, and frustration builds when definitions are not shared.
- •Communication modes: written vs. spoken, synchronous vs. asynchronous — and the risks of choosing by habit.
- •Cultural and language differences: "two nations divided by a common language".
- •Passive thinking vs. critical thinking, and why writing supports deeper reflection.
- •"Meetings are the last resort, not the first option" — and the true cost of a five-person, one-hour meeting.
- •Practices at companies like Amazon and Twitter, where written documents replace slide decks.
- •A closing question from Daniel Kahneman's Thinking, Fast and Slow — the bat and the ball.
References mentioned in the episode
- Book — Understanding A3 Thinking
- Book — Thinking, Fast and Slow, by Daniel Kahneman
- Book — Changing Your Team From The Inside
- Related episode — How to Create Great Goals?
- Original blog post — Coming to Terms with Terms
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